I have often been sentimental when it comes to relationships in fiction and media. I am tenderhearted towards epic or quiet romances alike, I invest deeply in family ties, and pine for iron-clad friendships. I may not be a consumer of harlequin romance novels, but I swoon as much as the next person over a well-executed romantic gesture. I love characters that are - by nature - "good", who frequently strive to do the kind and right thing. I like seeing people treat each other with respect and grace, it's comforting to see the best of humanity reflected in fiction. I don't tire of idealism - it's something I strive to keep within reach.

On the opposite end, sometimes I gravitate to things with a rougher exterior, characters that are fundamentally "good" - or at the very least "not bad" - but a bit pricklier in presentation. Relationships aren't always easy and people aren't always altruistic. Sometimes people say hurtful things and commit hurtful actions, and sometimes they are loved in spite of themselves. Being human means being messy and emotional, and we all do things we need to apologize for.


You're The Worst is the rare show that has scratched that itch for me. On paper, it doesn't necessarily look like my cup of tea. I have struggled with unlikable protagonists in the past, and while I would classify myself as open-minded, I tend to have more conservative sensibilities when it comes to comedies - I'm not that interested in the offensive, the crass, or the explicit.

And yet!

You're The Worst has terrible, childish, garbage personalities in spades - many of the characters are not "good people" and they certainly would never dare to be thoughtful or considerate (Edgar aside). They are all subject to their own insecurities, many of their mishaps are of their own making, and their flaws generally outnumber their strengths. But this weird little show is invested in the imperfect and frequently toxic relationship between Jimmy and Gretchen. This is what happens when a deeply broken, insecure, caustic woman-child screaming into the void to be loved and accepted collides with an also broken, narcissistic, insecure, acerbic man-child screaming into the void to be appreciated and applauded. It recognizes and features the dysfunction in their (likely doomed) relationship, even as it gives us those little moments to show us that these two terrible people do love each other despite it all. And that's before we dive into their relationships with their equally troubled and directionless friends.

The show bills itself as a comedy, and it's acerbic wit and crass, uncomfortable humour certainly classifies itself as such, never mind the increasingly ridiculous shenanigans the main quartet get into. But couched among this are moments of absolute, gut-punching devastation, which hurts all the more when used sparingly. The show tackles depression and failure and being an adult without knowing how to care for yourself and definitely not other people. And the penultimate episode of the show featured this beautifully in one of the storylines - using visual humour to great effect and making us feel safe and nostalgic in a long-running relationship before smashing it to smithereens. It hurts, but it's earned and that is truly laudable. 

(I have always been adamantly against "misery porn" because there is nothing enjoyable or even cathartic from ongoing, unrelenting, grim sadness. Life is and should be more varied than ongoing tragedy and misery with no end in sight. When something painful happens on a show, I want it to mean something, not just be the latest in a long line-up of terrible things.)

I will miss You're The Worst when it's finished. It's not a hopeful show, but it is just as equally not a hopeless one either. I don't know where I'll get my fix for terrible people sometimes striving to be good and to grow, but often not being able to even expend the energy to try because that's who they are at their core. I don't know that I could recommend this show to everyone - it is often a difficult show with frequently unlikable characters and its simultaneously mature/grossly immature humour is a bit much. But it has always been true to itself and its characters and if I had to have any show in my most disillusioning years thus far, I'm glad it was this one.